Tanorexic Victoria: "David, do you think this is too much?"
Hottest Man On Planet: "What, the bag? The glasses? The shoes? The coat?
TV: "The skin David, the skin. Am I too orange? I told them only three coats! This is what happens when you get three and a half David."
HMOP: "Sorry babe, but ever since you got me those ultra cool sunglasses with no UV protection I've been having trouble with me colours. Can't tell orange from brown these days."
TV: "I'll just tell Patrick to put a blue lens over his camera when he's shooting, that should fix it."
HMOTP: "Whatever you think darl."
Now, I quite love Victoria Beckham, I think she serves a purpose in this world (even if that is only one of being brave enough to wear the highest platform heels all over Milan's cobblestone streets), and I love her outfit here - slick, contemporary, polished. But doesn't she have enough moolah to dish out on an expensive spray tan?
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